Journey behind the passport stamps

We travel not to escape from life but to not let life escape from us. Whoever said that (not me) was completely right. I was leaving Dashain, maasuko parikar (khasiko choila, fried khasi, saadheko achaar, khasiko jhol, Bhutan, hyakula) and dakshina to travel so the journey had to be worth it.  After a tiresome journey we landed in Singapore “the Lion city”. Spotless clean roads guarded with bougainvillea hedges, the roads of Singapore from the airport into the city  itself were very pretty.

Exhausted by the journey my parents chose to rest but we sisters filled with curiosity had promised ourselves to walk till our feet hurt as we wouldn’t get the chance again. We walked for ten minutes and then reached Little India. From fresh flowers to dream catchers, from Diwali decorations to mithaais from Bikaner you could get everything at one place. The aroma of the mithaais and fresh flowers, the reflection of sparkling mirror handworks, Hindi tracks from various cities, foreigners buying Rajasthani handicrafts and children nagging for mithaais made the place livelier. As soon as we got out of the market there were almost 50 light arches giving the city a view like Navaratri hit Calcutta. From the extensive arrays of restaurant we chose an Indian restaurant nearby. The waiter smiled with freshly prepared biryani, raaita, greasy curries and sambar on banana leaf adding an Indian vibe to it. We ate till we looked three months pregnant.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

The best part of Singapore was the religious tolerance. There were mosques, churches and temples right next to each other and so were places to booze where people were clinking their beer jars but all of the people respected the differences and were living harmoniously.

Source: Internet

Along with our parents our very first destination was garden by the bay, a seaside botanical garden. The park that boasts of more than one million plants had various segments but we chose to visit cloud world and flower dome. With carved pumpkins, vibrant lights, statues and flowers, flower dome was quite clean and funky, but it didn’t touch my heart. (Have I become old?)

We then entered the cloud forest. Veiled in mist the mountain got colder and better as we climbed higher. After ten minutes of walking we reached the top and the view from that point was mesmerizing.

The alarm rang and it was next day, my ears which would never hear the beeps of alarm in other days perfectly functioned that day. Firstly we headed towards fountain of wealth in Suntec city. Largest fountain in the world, fountain of wealth was the place where the movie Krish was shot. Every time I struck a pose for photos I could feel the water droplets from the fountain on my body.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

Without sharing the whereabouts our guide took us to place which according to him we couldn’t afford to miss. When we arrived, we were standing in front of the Merlion. Merlion, a mythical creature with a lion's head and the body of a fish was definitely one of the most popular places of Singapore and was heavily crowded with thousands of people waiting to click pictures there. (my experience of rushing to take photos did work finally)

Courtesy: Ramesh Kumar Silwal

Just nearby the Merlion was the Singapore flyer. With glimpse of neighboring islands of Malaysia and Indonesia one could get a 360° view of Singapore. Slow and steady, the wheel did get dull at times and was a bit expensive.but overall it was beautiful. As I am a night person after looking at the day view I think it would have been better had we got the opportunity to ride on it at night as we would get a glittering.

A picture of the flyer which I took from the gardens by the bay

We then headed towards Sentosa Island. We had a concrete time plan so we rushed towards Madamme Tussauds. I would have loved it more had there been real people instead of wax statues (I mean who wouldn’t) but clicking pictures with the wax statues and learning the process of preparation of each one was interesting.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

We then headed to a 4 D movie building, which basically wasn’t a movie but there were actors delivering the history. I was shocked to know that Singapore had such a short history yet was so developed. Then I compared the timelines we read in social studies with the movie they used to teach history. It was crystal clear why Singapore is so developed and Nepal isn’t.

Source: Internet

At the end we went to watch the wings of time. Set in an open sea with nature as the screen, wings of time is an outdoor night show with a delicious fusion of water fountain, multimedia effects, laser lights, fire effects, entertaining music and a story. It is definitely a night extravaganza.

As I love lights visiting all the places I mentioned above would have been better at night time as the beauty of these places came into full effect. But nevertheless Singapore is definitely a place to visit and if you eat in places like Little India it isn’t that expensive too as it is described to be.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

The last day and the best one, visit to Universal Studios was a highlight in our Singapore tour. Located in Sentosa Island, universal studios is a world-class theme park and a glamorous world of movies. Every spot was begging to click a picture with it. The decor for each section was very striking. Six hours wasn’t enough for us as the studio had whopping list of entertaining activities. Thus if you are planning to visit this place any day it’s better to purchase an express pass. The express pass is worth the extra cost as it saves your day. As the studio closed by 6 p.m we missed few activities but we managed to have thrill rides of transformers, Jurassic rapids. Each themed activity had matching shops and 'inspired' food stores. It was a thoroughly fun day out with something suitable for all ages. It brought out the child in me. Let alone me, even my parents were also enjoying the games. This is definitely a place that I  will  take my children along in the future . That ended my trip in Singapore.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

Malaysia

Our second destination was Langkawi. As soon as I landed in Langkawi it gave me a Terai feel. I have never loved hot climate and getting grilled again was very painful. We had a very short trip planned in this place and I was happy about that. The toughest thing for me there was finding food as I am allergic to sea food. With every restaurants serving sea food and exuding aroma of prawns it was hard for me to get good food options. We entered to an Indian place expecting it to be like that of Singapore but the platter was so bad that it could neither go down the food pipe nor out of my mouth.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

As soon as we woke up we had a target to hit, Langkawi Island hopping. The Langkawi Island Hopping basically takes you on a journey of four different islands to explore the lavish beauty of nature. After a refreshing motor boat ride we reached to the first venue which was a private island. We basked in the sun and swam for an hour in the sea. Pristine white sandy beach crystal clear water, the beach was indeed heavenly; I collected some shells and corals too.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

As the second venue we were taken to Pregnant Maiden Island. The entire island seemed like a sleeping lady with a baby bump. After having lunch in our hotel we went for a boat ride to mangrove area. With roots above the land, the mangroves were worth visiting. The entire package included visiting bat cave and crocodile cave too which wasn’t that wonderful for me. Then we headed towards fish farm which was pretty amazing.

The experience of feeding sting ray with bare hands, playing with small fishes and touching spiny puffer fish felt incredible. As soon as the boat rider dropped chicken on the river the golden eagles that had been swooping high in the sky in the wild came to eat it. That was definitely a wonderful view.

The other places we went weren’t that beautiful and I was highly disappointed by Langkawi. I felt this area to be pretty hyped. Nevertheless the beaches were beautiful.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

Bali

Source: Internet

Finally we reached to our third destination Bali. Bali is indeed a perfect destination for a romantic getaway. The land of temples and graffiti, every nook and cranny of Bali is filled with art and you can feel the artistic vibe. Even the airport seemed like a temple. With 21 thousand temples on the island and every house with similar structure like that of temple, it felt like I was lost in a durbar square but one that was a hundred times bigger.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

We went to Uluwatu temple first. Very different from the conventional temples, this one has a captivating beauty and is very picturesque. Everything here is beautiful beyond words; the only thing you should be careful about is the monkeys. Popular for their aggression, one of the monkeys stole my mother’s spectacles and returned it back when it was offered food. Crazy right? Even monkeys in Bali trade.

Source: Internet

Next day, As soon as we picked up some food we rushed towards watching barong dance. The dance presenting the eternal battle between good and evil wasn’t fun at all. With catalog impossible to interpret and act hard to understand the dance was pretty disappointing. I would never recommend this to any Nepali as our very own laakhe dance is way better than it.

Source: Internet

After the dance we went to Kinataamani Volcanic Mountain. As there wasn’t a single place from which we could observe the mountain and a lake below so we went to a halaal cafe nearby. Eating with a splendid view, cold breeze playing with my hair did cheer me up.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

As we had enough of free time we hopped into Starbucks.  As usual Starbucks had  warm ambience and friendly staff but the difference that day was the menu. Pink coffees were also served to raise voice against women violence. We ordered two of them. One was too sweet for my taste while the other one was just fine. We sisters grabbed our coffees and started walking again.

It had been two days that we had come to Baali and there wasn’t a single alley where we weren’t invited for a massage. Thus we made up our minds to pamper our feet and have a fish spa. The staff of the massage center washed our legs and then we dipped our legs in the tank. As soon as we dipped our legs, the fishes swam swiftly towards our feet and started devouring the dead cells. My sister enjoyed it more as there were plenty of fishes around her feet (she definitely needs to clean her legs pretty often :P) How did I feel? Ticklish and soothing. Soothing as the water was pretty cool and ticklish well 70 fishes kissing ones legs is ticklish. Our legs became softer and looked nice but for a while only.

Courtesy: Shraddha Suman Silwal

Source: Internet

As soon as we had our Indonesian breakfast we drove toward Tanah lot. A Balinese coastal temple situated on a rocky mountain with black rocks the temple had a charm of its own.

Finally we were taken for a cruise dinner. The cruise didn’t meet my previous experience in Seattle but the entertainment activities were fun. The wind, the sceneries and the food were dull comparing to Seattle but nevertheless the cultural dance, musical performance and magic was fun.

Overall the journey was perfect. The only suggestion I have to give if you are planning to visit Baali is be aware of the guides there. I ain’t saying because we met one guide but after talking with other Nepalese families they had similar experiences.

What did I come back with? Tanned skin, a tad of fats, bucket full of memories and a completely freshened body.

PINK Mocking hypocrisy like never before

I got my hands into Pink exactly after one year of it’s release and I am happy that it happened. I loved the movie for the fact that it perfectly portrays a misogynist society where the stereotypical norms and prejudice only shackles women. Pink was a surprising exception among the movies crossing hundred crores with five songs, few kissing scenes, humor, a bit of Bollywood masaala and well known celebrities. Gripping from the start to end, Pink is a courtroom drama revolving around the lives of three working women who stay in South Delhi and are flat mates.

Summing the movie in short, three women go to a rock show and have dinner with newly met friends. Unfortunately the evening takes an ugly turn for them after a couple of drinks. Rajveer molests Meenal and as a step of self-protection she hits Rajveer on the head, injuring his eye. These girls lose their smiles and peace of mind but when nothing pops up for three days they believe the story has ended. Rajveer who cannot believe he nearly lost an eye because a woman hit him decides to seek vengeance on them. The three women are subjected to constant threats, intimidation and harassment from Rajveer and his friends. Meenal is abducted and terrorized, Meenal's roommate Falak loses her job because of morphed pictures of her on a porn site, Andria is sent threatening messages on phone and their amiable landlord is threatened with harm until he evicts the girls. The boys lay siege and do their best to break the women into submission.  The guys malign and intimidate them in every way possible but when it doesn’t work Rajveer uses his powerful connections to file a wrong FIR against the girls labeling them prostitutes. When no lawyer is ready to fight their case, the creepy neighbor suffering from bipolar disorder comes to their rescue. As the case unfolds we can see the deep set prejudice of the society. Prosecutor tries to break them down by trying to prove all three to be promiscuous. Meenal is asked scathing questions. Prying neighbors build the women’s character on crazy speculations and blame them. Even a woman investigative officer forgets her womanhood and helps the wrong ones in their ill motives. Police disapproves to lodge a complaint just because the perpetrator is from an influential household. But with the help of the lawyer, the women triumph over the odds and like a phoenix they rise from ashes.

The movie clearly lays bare the double standards of the society we live in where women who drink are believed to be characterless but alcohol consumption for male is considered just a health hazard. Being feisty and frank for woman is considered to giving hints for sexual approach but for men it is considered to being friendly. It’s fine for men to live independently in a city but not for a woman as it confuses men. It’s okay for men to visit their female friends in their flats but a woman will be judged for bringing a man to her flat. If a woman has a sexual history she is of questionable character but a man’s isn’t a questionable matter though it needs two to tango.

It mocks the society where the ticks of the clock and venue determine a woman’s character. A woman is believed to be giving hints if she is present in rock show but she is believed to be from a decent household if she is found in a library or a temple. Where character assassination and slut shaming is all it needs to break a girl down. It beautifully pictures our society where men and women are judged by a different moral yardstick and ridicules people who assume that if a woman is willingly roaming around with a man then he has the license to touch her. It presents the hollow mentality of men which believes a girl who is ready to drink with them would have no problem to sleep with them either.

Acting of all the characters are so convincing and top notch that you start hating the prosecutor every time he trashes the female character and tries to modify truth for his profit, you start hating the male characters every moment  they pass a sexist comment. The anxiety, frustrations and angst of the three flat mates is so realistic that you start to see yourself in their shoes.  Even in his seventies Amitabh Bacchan wows the audience by his magnetic and prolific acting. The hard hitting dialogues which embarrass and enlighten you at the same time, well fleshed story and the acting makes the movie worth a watch. The movie perfectly establishes the fact that when a girl says no to being touched, then no man has the right to force himself on her whether a woman is a sex-worker, wife or slave. No isn’t a word but it is itself a sentence which needs no logic clarification or explanation.

Pink is a powerful statement on the existing feudal mindset of a majority of India. Though set in Delhi the movie was quite contextual and relateable. The concept was nothing new and I have been feeling it as a Nepali woman too yet it gave me goose bumps. A very single plot conveys so heavy message with such an ease that it demands for appreciation. Pink is definitely worth a watch.

The Empire

I am not a food blogger but I was compelled to write one after I stepped THE EMPIRE. Food has always been my first love and my guilty indulgence. But the thing I have hated the most was running from one place to other as not everything could be found under the same roof. But then I landed to this multi-cuisine restaurant.  To my surprise this place has such an extensive menu to offer that it was simply a delight. The most difficult choice was to whittle down.  Thai, Japanese, Italian, Nepali or Continental, name it and it’s all here. With sophisticated Insta worthy interior, warming illuminating lights, the restaurant is pretty impressive. The place exudes elegance and charm. The multi cuisine restaurant also serves hot and cold brews with wide ranges of cocktails/mocktails and imported drinks.

As we were giving the orders music played lightly, a fountain trickled behind us and hanging lights twinkled above our table, giving the terrace a charming ambiance. While the cuisines were being prepared we thought of taking a closer look of the restaurant. The thing that stood out for me was the quotes they used and the unique way of presenting lights. Just besides the bar we could see the chefs preparing the food items. The kitchen was not only clean and hygienic but the visitors could also see how the food was getting prepared.  This cafe is a completely unexpected jewel in the heart of the city. No wonder it is an empire of its own.

From all the food items we had there, I present the five must try cuisines of this place! 

Som Tum

Freshly prepared right before your eyes, tangy Som Tum is a relish for your taste buds and perfectly fits in your diet chart. And guess what? It has lesser calories than your regular morning oatmeal i.e 125 calories only and has no oil in it :D Pretty light and heaven for your tongue Som Tum contains papaya shreds, roasted peanuts, long beans, tomatoes and spices.  Healthy food can be tasty too aye!

Tom Yum Kai

One of the most iconic cuisines of Thailand, Tom Yam Kai is a must try here. Prepared with lemon grass, chicken, galangal, button mushrooms and spices the soup perfectly balances the sweet, salty and sour taste. The chef here has brought a variation to the old rustic style of Tom Yum adding coconut milk instead of chicken stock giving it a creamy and milky taste. Good news? Just 121 calories!

Cheese Balls 




The cheddar cheese balls do not seem different from the regular cheese ball but the buttoned mushroom in the center gives it a twist. Crunchy texture outside and cheese inside it contains whooping 150 calories in each ball. Definitely a hearty load of carbs.

Ostrich Chhoila



As the server brought the food, the tempting aroma of fresh green garlic and fenugreek was all around making it feel like it had come out fresh from a newari household. Succulent and zesty the smoky flavor and the marination in the chhoila helped to retain the authentic newari flavor. Let’s face it, it is not as healthy as the salad and soup and has generous amount of spices but baby it’s worth it! 

Fruit Sundae

A sweet treat is the ultimate finale to any fine meal and our meal ended with fruity Sundae. Fun yet elegant the sundae was layered up with generous scoops of ice-cream, chopped fruits, thin apple wedges, chocolate chips and sauce. The sundae hit my sweet spot pretty well. The chef definitely knows what he is into.  The ice cream perfectly blended with the diced fruits and the presentation did look gorgeous. Getting indulged on such a sweet heaven with an enchanting surrounding and panoramic view of Durbarmarg did soothe my soul.

Overall it’s a pretty fancy place with awesome song selection and refreshingly breezy air. The place is perfect for every purpose whether it’s sharing your stories with friends over brewing cups of coffee or meeting your love for a date or going out for a family dinner. Heavy breakfast, lunch, brunch or dinner you can hop in anytime. A tad expensive but you can definitely not expect a restaurant in Durbarmarg to be cheap. Can't wait to go back and try this place out again !

PC: Sumit K.C
       The Empire

A man’s letter to the world

Dear world,

I am a man. A privileged man as the society labels who has to ask his girl even before switching to the next channel. Here I welcome you all to my puny world. I can never open up and can never tell you what I feel as I fear I will be laughed at. I hate Amitabh Bacchan as my entire life was spent on proving that mardko dard nahi hota is true. My tear glands are expected to be dysfunctional and I have to bottle up my pain and if I accidentally do cry there is a high chance that I will be termed a wimp.

I don’t want people to leave me like my ex did just because I was not good enough. Since childhood I had been the man who women regard their dream boys to be like; who is loyal and who doesn’t disrespect them, yet I always got friend zoned because whatever philosophies women blurt out at the end she needs that filthy rich brat. Isn’t it funny? People said that it was her choice and she had the right to marry the right guy. Would the reactions be same had I dumped her saying that she wasn’t good enough or hot enough? We are looked at purely by how much money we make. I don’t have the liberty to quit my 8-4 job and to chase my dreams because that would mean there would always be a risk that I might fail; fail to pay for dates, fail to fill my ever thirsty bike with petrol. If I leave my job I would be a NIKAMMA but if my girl would leave her job and stay home with my family people would term her selfless. Why is marrying a rich guy no big deal but marrying a wealthy chic and expecting life to be better a sin? If men have always settled with less richer women why is it so tough for women to do so, now that they are so much into equality? Women are expected to be insecure and their insecurity is almost celebrated. Then why are we crucified and termed a looser if we are insecure?

Oh yes she also complained that I didn’t own a good physique. Why do women equate a man's body size with masculinity and status? It sucks when I have to fulfill a freaking criteria for a woman to even give me some time of her day .I hated it when my ex-girlfriend never introduced me to her friends circle because somewhere inside I knew she was embarrassed. Ohh! There were some sexy ones too. If she would ask me it would be an expectation but if I did similar it would be body shaming. Every time I scrolled through her search button she would call that as intruding her privacy and trust me majority of her searches’ would be boys. If I talked to other girl it would be flirting if she did so it would be just a polite gesture. It was her choice to interact with anyone at any time, with how many, for how long she felt like but me doing so would be seeing that girl in my block list the very other day.  There would always be a heated argument if I asked her to do the same, always.

I would never complain if I had to ride my bike every time we went for dates but if I had to give my bike for servicing and ask her to ride her scooter for a day she would make sure to repeat it every day till I got it for servicing next month.  Every time I give my bike for service and I have to travel through Nepal Yatayat I completely freak out. Not because of its super-fast speed, if you see me riding, I would bring the fastest rider to shame but I have to look around throughout the journey so that I don’t mistakenly touch any girl and I wouldn’t be the lusty guy.

She was already a mess and to kill me more the society popped up. Every time I carried her shopping bags aunties would claim that I had already become a “joitingre” before marriage and every time I made her carry her bags herself, the young girls around would call me rude. Ahh! The slim glistening legs of those girls. Why is it that every time a woman gets slapped or hit or raped there are thousands of organizations to fight for her but none for me? If I don’t retaliate I get called a COWARD if I do I am an oppressor. At times I and my brothers have to think twice before doing anything because we might be accused of being "sexist pigs" or "tools of the patriarchy."

After pleasing the girl of my life another bossy woman of my life my “mom” would be waiting for me fuming with anger. Women who say that their moms don’t allow them to come home late should have met mine. I am no different. After 7 my phone rings incessantly. My mom would be presuming that I was in drugs, while my ex-girlfriend would think I was screwing other women when I would be slogging in office just to find that one fault in coding. How could I forget my boss who never leaves a chance to make me feel that I am one big sucker!

Yes we are no more together now. But every time I imagine her with her NRN husband I go through and excruciating pain and I mentally wish that she would miss me and find me better in bed. I know I have been nagging throughout well I don’t know where I could vent my frustration.

Whatever it is I have moved on if it wasn’t her well there are plenty of women out there. Now I have started developing feelings for another girl. We go to dates or at least I feel so. When I pay for her, pull a chair for her and try to protect her from the world I don’t doubt on her strength but I want my gestures to prove my love for her because I do. She earns more than me and I have no problem with that. My woman’s success would never intimidate me because my love for her is bigger than my ego. I will have to be Bill Gates for not anyone to be richer and well technically I am not him. So it’s okay.

She can easily apply cake of makeup, wear push up bras and buttock enhancing garments, choose dresses from wide range of varieties, conceal her belly fat with belts, switch to a high heels and she looks amazing. What about me? Oh I can wear clean dresses and maybe a clean shave. Would that side plate make me look better? Why can’t women approach men if they find us cute or let’s say sexy! It’s always me who has to initiate and God bless me if something goes wrong because I would be suddenly called a creep or weirdo or a despo. Arghhh.

I think from my dick and I am a BOKA? Well I am sorry that my testosterone makes me go crazy as soon as I see a woman coming towards me. There’s that fault in my eyes and there’s fault in my dick too that it stands still every time a hot lady appears. I mentally undress her and fantasize everything everywhere possible in the planet. But I don’t go to every woman to grope or fondle their body parts. Well with so many rape cases being highlighted by the media you don’t have other options too, but men as me do exist and you ought to reward them!

It hurts me when society tells that all men are dogs but not all women are bitches. I have seen women who married just to get divorced and get money from the husband’s side; who have faked to become pregnant and carried someone else’s child, accused men of rape using the guys drunken state for their advantage. And people say women are the only victims :/

When I say this I don’t mean it’s easy to be a woman. But you gotta step in my shoes too! At times I just want to escape from all the pressure, stop being manly, stop being the bread winner, embrace my insecurities and just not be called a loser. To that person who has this letter on his/her hand how do you think should I behave? If you are a woman I desperately need an advice if you are a man maybe you could relate!

Yours faithfully,
A privileged man

YES I GET RED-ily WET

Studying in GEMS meant that we couldn’t attend our activities without our white skirts on. It was mathematics class when my friend experienced periods for the very first time.  I still remember how petrified and embarrassed she was when she came to know about it. She asked a friend close to her to walk her to the infirmary in such a way that no one would notice the blood spot. She went to the infirmary got a sanitary pad and had her skirt stapled in such a way that her stain wasn’t noticeable. She came to the class but as the staples couldn’t withstand the pressure of folds, it freed itself for all to see the blood spot very clearly. The guys started to ridicule her and the worst part the girls were trying to move farther rather than helping her out. Only when I reminded all the guys and girls that they had to pass through the very vagina of their mothers which bled every month to be born they kept their mouth shut. She couldn’t face the class for 3 consecutive days. How could I forget the ink spots? All the female students of GEMS can easily relate to me as a significant portion of their life went on spilling more ink on the blood spot so that it wouldn’t be visible.

Women have been bleeding since ages. Well the human civilization is a perfect evidence for it. But every time the topic MENSTRUATION CYCLE pops up people try to run away as if they were trying to plant bombs in front of Donald Trump. Every time the lesson 9 (As the book we read always had reproductive system and health as 9^th chapter from grade 7 to 10) in E.P.H comes; the teacher goes red and skips it. If by any chance the teacher is accountable, s/he reads through the entire process on one go and ends it and asks students to read themselves. Even that girl whose favorite color is pink and seems like walking candy floss would be casual for those four days and wear the darkest color available. The very first time I asked the shopkeeper of the pharmaceutical not to wrap the pad with sheets of newspapers he was struck in horror as if I had asked him a very intimate question. Not that he is comfortable with the concept already but things have slightly changed. But as I step out of the store suddenly eyes follow me as if sanitary pads were nightmares. What people really need to know is stigma and shame is taught. We have to break this cycle of learned embarrassment. The more we talk the less power will the stigma hold. Our hormones hits us pretty bad people should not make it tougher.

Suddenly the PMS monster possesses you and you go through the roller coaster of hormones. You smile and are all good and cheerful at a moment but the very other moment you get sad, frustrated, annoyed in things which doesn’t even demand slightest attention.  You get skin breakout, loose bowel, swelling feet, immensely painful back and thighs and hurting abdomen.  Pills and hot water bags suddenly becomes your sweetheart.

Whenever a pregnant woman walks by the road people congratulate her but never has she been congratulated for enduring the series of periods she has been through to get that baby. Would that be possible hadn’t she bled? Could people comment on Facebook pictures of their babies stating “awww” hadn’t she bled? How would the great grandparents get their panaati and panaatinis hadn’t the mother bled? Then why is such a cool thing getting so much of shame? Why is it still marked as “a tormenting thing” that sanitary advertisements claim that you will not feel like you are on periods if you wear their products? Why the message is pushed so bad that periods are gross? Why don’t people consider it to be a detox process? I don’t know how will the necessity to talk stop when no one talks about it. Why isn’t the pain ever talked about?  Talking about periods is a need of the hour and it’s no private women business. It should not be limited to be a parameter of not being pregnant for couples to be happy about. Yes I bleed and I bleed loads of it. The very first time I had one I believed I went through an infection. When my mom explained me everything properly then did I know about it. Ok I have not been through chaupadi, I am not left to die alone and my parents are cool enough to talk about it but still why do I talk about it?  I bleed every four days a month which makes it 48 days per year. I get that blood flood for 46,080 hours in my entire lifetime and I can’t endure those scornful eyes and hitler-ly dictatorship on what to do and what not to any more. I still have my well educated cousins who would ask me to stay in the corner and not even let me move. Not everyone I get surrounded with perceives it similarly so I need to talk about it.  If it’s that time of the month then there are people saying:

Don’t enter to temples?

I ask why?

They say Because it has been happening since ages.

I ask a why?

They have No answer.

If periods were so wrong why would their god invent it?

Well maybe they are right had it been many years back when people had little knowledge on menstrual hygiene or when sanitary pads weren’t readily available but now when people are already clean why intimidate the younger generations? Why not rather teach them about the better techniques?

Tell people

Just because the word “menstruation” has a “MEN” in it doesn’t help them to know everything. Remember women are the only reference for men to know how it feels. There’s no point on enduring the pain and not letting people know. If you are nauseatic and dizzy and you feel weak then BLURT IT OUT. Things get greater attention when hidden. None of my male friends have ever made fun of it when I have told that I am going through periods. But hiding it definitely provides a space for hush hush.

Don’t tell people

Opposite to the upper point? Well that’s what my mom has taught me. If you are not feeling unwell, you are perfectly fine and can work well you don’t have to let everyone know. Just make sure you have your pads on and you are ready to go.

What do I get out of it? I envision a period friendly society where my daughter would be heartily welcomed and not named impure if she were on her periods. Where she would always find her parents, teachers, friends and basically everyone if she feels low or curious about it .I envision a society where periods are taken naturally. See it's that simple!