नसकिने के छ

Impossible remains to be impossible until someone proves otherwise. People found the idea of flight for humans to be impossible until wright brothers took the first solid steps and proved it to be otherwise. 100 meters in a meager 9.58 secs is impossible to us but the continuous effort and dedication of USAIN BOLT made it possible.

In a land where the government is corrupt, people are drowning in poverty and strikes are our weekly national holidays, people have lost hope for their nation and for themselves. Living in a fairy dream that gold trees sprout in the foreign land, 1500 Nepalese emigrate in the hope of a brighter future through foreign employment. Our market is very unstructured and the supply to demand ratio isn’t equal, but with relentless effort we’ll be able to crack it.

A 3 storied building and boarding schools for his children is a dream of every low living Nepali and a reality for a ‘PaniPuri’ vendor in Surunga, Jhapa. Many of us might have heard about Honacha, a newari restaurant in mangalbazar and some of us might have been there as well. Do you believe that the owner of Honacha is richer than many of us present out here. See! The thing is not to inherit tons of property and a lucrative opportunity, but to create opportunities.

 Looking back to my initiative ‘SCARF MOVEMENT’, there were voices saying it wouldn’t be a success, let alone make a positive difference. These voices got to me at times and I doubted if it would reach its marks as it was 10 days after the acid and infant rape incident. Then I took it as a challenge to prove them wrong and make a change. I cant recall the number of schools and colleges, organizations and clubs to F.M. stations I went in a narrow time frame of two days, for all I intended was the voices to be heard and not for popularity or for monetary  causes.

True inspiration comes from the source of our motive. Interviewing the survivor in her disfigured yet unflinching courageous state, it fueled my motive and as a result thousand’s gathered in Basantapur with placards, banners and slogans to fight with Sangita, the acid attack survivor. Good media coverage helped to make a difference and within few days the perpetrator Jiwan B.K. was caught. The thing is not to boast about my movement but a personal experence to prove that “If we want something Wholeheartedly. The entire universe conspires to make it ours”. Jiwan B.K. was caught just a few days after our movement but still I don't regard the movement has been successful. I hope that the government takes the required action, builds up a strong legislative and emphasize on her treatment and rehabilitation.

It’s always hard to resist inertia. Having stated that, its really difficult to take a tiny step in the very early phase. But as steps go on, it gains momentum and the journey ahead gets easier. The motive behind the movement wasn’t to gain sympathy but empathy and collective hands. We as human beings shouldn’t just feel sorry for the other soul, but make their pain our very own, to imagine ourselves in the very shoes of the other, and then and only then can true change come.

We are more than happy to oblige being enslaved in foreign land, but becomes a matter of shame here. The lovely daughters and sons of the so called ‘GHARANIYA PARIWAR’ who never had to raise a plate for themselves are waiting tables at Mc. Donalds, KFC and food courts. How wonderful it is that they boast about their job, their somewhat independence from their parental income. Believe me no work is small and no profession is due for disgrace. its our narrow spectrum with which we see the world that make professions and professionals seem small. Everyone is important in their own way, Regardless of the professions we embrace. We should try to excel in it, be a leader and aspire others to someday be leaders and aspire others similarly.

Strategizing for others downfall, gossiping a rumor, inhibiting someone’s growth has never helped someone grow. It simply holds the others for a while only for them to come stronger and smarter. What choice do you make, act the villain or the co-star to success and growth? A talking mouth or a helping hand? A loved one or a hated one? The choice is yours to make.

Earthquake and Child Psychology

The rattling that shook the whole nation has shaken our mindset even harder. Scientists claim that the clash of the Indian and the Eurasian plates gave birth to the massive earthquake while some people state that it is due to god Shivaa's leela. Whatever the reason is the fact is that the 7.9 magnitude jolt shook the country and has left thousands dead and many more injured. Places that once were homes are now nothing more than piles of rubble and sites for mass graveyard. Dead bodies have still been left unattended and people have lost hope of finding any belongings in a usable state. It feels like we have been engulfed into darkness and in every lightning corpses are produced.

Some are fortunate enough that even today their houses in which they live are intact and habitable. However there are thousands who have become homeless and are forced to live in open regardless of the harsh weather. Thus in order to provide a helping hand to those we made a focal point: to help children. UN estimates that more than 1 million children are affected by the recent earthquake and these problems should be addressed as soon as possible. In order to assess the impacts we went to Kavre, Sindupalchok, Dhading and Kathmandu. The assessment in Dhading was easier due to abundance in stationery and the guidance of psychologist Ganga Pathak.

While in Kathmandu we are still conducting daily observation of the children. When asked to draw cracked buildings, injured people ,hospitals and black Dharara were all they could come up with, portraying their mindset which has been heavily disturbed by earthquake. Some children tightly clung to their parents with every minor aftershocks while some never let tears off their eyes, some had become claustrophobic and insomniac while some never let their parents off their sight. According to the parents the children under tarpaulins had lost their appetite and refused to return to their homes even after a week of the quake and would just gaze away.

After reaching to the disaster zones it could be analyzed that the places which gained attention wanes were mounted and piled up with relief materials and funds while others who were equally hit by the quake were empty handed. From the numerous field visits it could be concluded that children from the villages were in a better mental state compared to that of city. .Some of the reasons behind are:

1) Free space: Unplanned urbanization and few open spaces compel people into crowded situations with unknown people making the children feel uneasy to move around. False rumors quickly spread in such places further contributing to fear and the terror.

2) Media: With the media outlets concentrated in the city, the children are quickly exposed to the depressing news of deaths and injuries further traumatizing them.

3) No means of distraction: Usually in the village areas the children are engaged in something or other. They have to look after the livestock and commit to household chores. But it’s not so for the urban area. Closed entertainment centers, schools, malls and no proper access to technology has further worsened the situation making it hard for them to open up.

In "Child friendly Spaces" a program organized by UNICEF, World Education foundation and CWISH I as a teacher found the students confined to themselves in the initial phase. With the days that passed by, games, dance, activities and story books gradually returned them to their normal self. Taking a glance at the children's situation they are in dire need of motivation, counseling and psychological treatment. Some may be able to cope up and heal with time while for those who are deeply affected by the quake must go under creative expression therapies, counseling and various other therapies under expert guidance

Children are raw and immature to the immensity of the devastation and problems. Children have a lot to learn and are very sensitive to situations and being so imagine the trauma and wound inflicted upon the minds of innocence and compassion. If the problems are not addressed immediately then it might leave them scarred for life.

Violence Against Women

With the increase in number of seminars, conferences, movements, rallies and literacy rate, it is legitimate to expect cases of violence against women to stop. But why do we still find stories of pain and why doesn't it take a name to stop? Why have complains regarding women violence been soaring up in alarming rate? Why isn't education helping to improve the present scenario? Why don’t people lodge complains against the perpetrators even when they know that whatever is happening with them is wrong? Well I believe it is all because of society.

However educated a woman or a girl is she still fears the social stigma because she knows that she will be looked at with scornful eyes even when she is proven to be innocent and the perpetrator to be guilty. She knows that speaking a word against the patriarchal members of the society will defame and bring dishonor to her family .She silently accepts what’s happening because she is inculcated to do so.

Two girls preparing for their S.L.C exams are attacked with acid in the center of the capital city. After rigorous efforts, movements, campaigns demanding stronger legislation, investigation and constant attacks by media the accused gets caught one month later. It becomes sensational news to the media. When he laughs remorselessly in the press release outrage is sparked in social media.  People salute Nepal police for their success. Then two days later the criminal turns out to be portrayed as a victim of untouchability .He is said to be a depression patient. Suddenly all the women right activists keep quiet. People start believing whatever he says. People forget that no reason is valid for the heinous crime he has done. People forget that every criminal has a dark past. People forget that a person who lies to his parents can easily trick others. People forget how remorselessly he had attacked the girls. People forget that the attack was not done when he was criticized or when he was regarded as untouchable but after he got thrown out of the selection in army. People forget that he crossed his boundaries as a teacher and established relation with a student. Suddenly his letters start  getting published in online portals where he states that he had done everything with Sangita except having a physical relationship. He proudly states that he doesn't regret for his monstrous act. People start feeling pity on him and the case is totally diverged. Not a single reporter again goes to the victim to verify the truth.Why? Because that’s what happens when a girl rejects a guy who establishes a relationship in the base of lie.  The victim’s family regrets for lodging the case.

A police constable is accused to rape a 13 year old child in Doti . I don’t think she was provoking enough or she was dressed in such a manner to get pregnant.  But still she was raped. But trust one day or the other she will be pointed at on her character. Guys will think 1000 times before marrying her. Even when the society knows when it was not her mistake and she did not approach for it.

People might present the case of 6 year old Puja Sah. Yes, I agree that it was justice in her case but there are thousands of Puja who have become voiceless.  But the solutions are so simple. Just change your mentality, don’t run after the current and change your actions. If everyone will do so there will be no violence against men or women.  

The Seventy Two hours

Those three days were the most terrifying days of my life. We just didn't lose thousands of our brothers and sisters, all our hopes were shattered into fragments, our cultural heritage sites turned into rubble and many small entities of our life lost. Seeing people wounded, crying for treatment, wailing in memory of their lost ones and trauma and affliction everywhere is a sight no one would ever wish to see or feel even in their worst nightmares.

Once again mother nature had proven that no man made invention is stronger than her. Nepal has once again lost thousands of its children and has been pushed 10 years back. Like after every rainfall there appears a beautiful rainbow, like after every sunset there is a sunrise I hope the wounds will gradually heal, new hopes will emerge and people will once again start their lives anew.